


When What You Want and What You Need Are The Same Thing

by AnotherDayInHistory



Series: What You Want [2]
Category: The Voice (US) RPF
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Kid Fic, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-05
Updated: 2016-01-05
Packaged: 2018-05-11 21:20:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5642386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnotherDayInHistory/pseuds/AnotherDayInHistory
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wherein Gwen reviews her year, and the future, and decides that this is where she's meant to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When What You Want and What You Need Are The Same Thing

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jj3](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jj3/gifts).



> The lovely commenter jj3 asked me for a fic where Gwen and Blake have that child that I talked about in my first fic in this series, and my muse got away from me and made this. It's a little more "snapshot"-y than my other fics (yes snapshot-y is a word, I just made it up. Hey, Shakespeare made up words too so don't judge me :P). Bottom line is i'd love to hear comments on what you all think.

If anyone had told Gwen that she would be where she is now a year ago, she probably would have laughed in their face. Although things weren’t _good_ between her and Gavin a year ago, they were still ok and even though they already had problems and slept separately most of the time (Gavin complained she moved too much and stole the covers and snored and that he was a light sleeper), Gwen was determined to work things out for the sake of her family. That’s what marriage was about; she’d always thought. Marriage wasn’t perfect, it was rocky and rough and sometimes unpleasant but you stayed with it for the good times.

 

Oh how her views had changed in a year. She’d learned so much. She’d learned that some marriages weren’t worth fighting for, that sometimes people got married too quickly or for the wrong reasons or because they thought the other was all that they deserved (Blake had helped her see that—even though he never told her anything like it—but his actions had helped her see that the only reason she married Gavin was because she didn’t think she could get anyone better). She learned that there was no shame in divorce, no shame in moving on with your life and making a better one for yourself. That’s what she’d done after all, she’d made the decision to break up their family (well, Gavin had when he decided to stick his dick in places it didn’t belong but she knew they were heading in the divorce direction anyways even before she found out about the nanny) and tried to do better for herself. She’d kept their house, gotten rid of all their shared furniture that he didn’t want (and it had involved lots of red wine and the small urge to burn it all but her sense of responsibility had taken ahold of her before long and she had calmly donated it all to homeless shelters before going out and buying the things for her house that she wanted, anyone else’s taste be damned), converted his office into a kid’s music room for her boys to practice (more like twang badly at the strings of a guitar and hoot mournfully through the trumpet but hey, they were young, they’d learn), and started wearing what she wanted to wear. She walked around the house for an entire day with no makeup on (for the first time in so many years she couldn’t remember), her natural hair, sweatpants, and glasses, and she _loved_ it. 

 

Even though she took so many important steps to change her life for the better after the divorce, what really saved her was her cowboy. He’d been there for the worst of it (hell he was going through it too). They’d gotten fall over drunk together and had cried over their exes (she discovered Blake was rather emotional under his manly-man facade and seeing his tears was such a change over Gavin’s British stoicism that she’d stared at him with wide eyes before hugging him tightly as he buried his vodka-red face in her shoulder), they’d called each other in the middle of the night when they had dreams about their exes that particularly upset them or when Miranda or Gavin had done something awful. Blake had been her rock.

 

 He made her laugh more quickly than anyone ever had (proper laughter that involved tears running down her face and snorting, not just the polite feminine laughter she used for the press). He made funny jokes and learned her sense of humor and sent her hilarious links and videos over text in the middle of the night when he couldn’t sleep and acted basically like a total dweeb just to please her. They’d gotten so close at the beginning of Season 9 (not counting the kiss in Season 7 after the lip-sync that Gwen still thought about as one of the best and worst moments of her life and Gavin’s kisses had never felt the same afterwards), and Gwen had started to flirt one day and hadn’t been surprised he flirted back and they went back and forth for awhile before he’d kissed her in her trailer one day before the taping, a soft gentle kiss, but had then moved back like he’d been struck. He had a look in his eye like he expected to be scoffed at and rejected, like he was about to be told that they couldn’t just like she had after their kiss last year, and Gwen had touched her fingertips to her lips and smiled before practically tackling him to the couch and sticking her tongue in his mouth for a proper teenage-style make-out session that radically outshined the frantic kiss they’d had in his dressing room after the lip-sync a year ago.

 

Their relationship had evolved from there, evolved from make-outs to actual proper dates with handholding to sex to mushy kisses on each other’s cheeks to staring at each other in full view of the cameras like they were each others’ everything. Gwen had realized that Blake loved her snoring (he called it snuffling and said it helped him sleep) and that he got too hot in bed anyways so her stealing the covers was okay and that he held her down against his body too much as he cuddled her for her to be able to move around like she used to in bed.

 

Gwen had asked her kids if they minded moving their music room again and they’d agreed, so she’d turned Gavin’s former office into one for him when he stayed over, with pictures of the ranch in Oklahoma and the refurbished mahogany desk his grandfather had owned when Blake was a kid where Blake had learned about his favorite country artists and where he’d gone after his brother had been killed and he couldn't handle the misery at home. (she’d gotten the idea from his mom after visiting and talking with Mrs. Shelton late in the night and learning how much Blake adored his grandfather when he was alive and how devastated he’d been as a teenager when he’d died and his desk had to be auctioned off to pay his funeral expenses. She’d learned how Blake had tried to save up for it with lots of jobs around town but nowhere had paid what the auction house would and she’d learned how Blake had watched the desk go away with bitter eyes before locking himself in his room for a week and only coming out for meals. She herself as well as five of her people had tracked the desk down to a family in Arkansas who hadn’t taken very good care of it; she’d paid out the nose to buy it from them and then took it to the best furniture restorer in California to have it refurbished to look the way it did when Blake was a kid. She’d surprised him with it on his birthday, had tied one of his ties around his eyes and led him to the space before undoing it with a flourish and holding her arms out to the desk. Blake’s eyes had widened to the size of saucers before he’d walked over to it, reverently touching his fingertips over the wood and shutting his eyes against the memories. He’d picked her up and spun her around when he learned that it was the same desk, before sitting in the leather chair she’d bought for him and manhandling her to sit on his lap and burying his face into his favorite place between her neck and her shoulder and Gwen didn’t comment about the dampness that was there when he pulled his head back to kiss her deeply). They’d moved into Gwen’s house together and his shoes had migrated to her front foyer along with hers and her kids’ and her kids started calling Blake their stepdad (Blake had hugged them deeply when he’d heard it for the first time and the kids had shaken it off like it was no big deal, like _of course_ Blake was their stepdad, and Blake had a cat that got the cream grin all day). 

 

A year ago, Gwen would have never imagined that she’d be here. Yet, here she was, sitting in the bathroom with a stick in her hand that said _positive_ and her stomach in her throat. She’d felt the signs, felt the nausea and her breasts getting tender and had missed her period but she thought it was m _enopause._ Oh my god she was nearing 50 and was pregnant. Even as she was more scared than she’d ever been in her life, even as she didn’t know that she could go through with the pain of childbirth again without a boatload of drugs to ease her way, she felt tears come to her eyes that had nothing to do with sadness and everything to do with joy. She wrapped one hand around her stomach, and for the first time pictured a little girl with curly hair like Blake and Blake’s dimples and her chocolate brown eyes and the way Blake would call her a little princess and she laughed a little to herself (she didn't know about the dreams Blake had had while married to Miranda until later; he told her one night when he was a little tipsy off of mulled wine and a little drunk on her face in the firelight).

 

Luckily, she’d had the house to herself that night she found out, Blake being out of town on a tour stop and the boys being with Gavin. Luckily she had the house to herself because she didn’t think she could keep her rapture to herself even if she’d wanted to, she didn’t think she could stop the wide joyous smile and the way she shielded her belly from even the most gentle of bumps. She’d gone to her doctor the next morning and figured out how far along she was and she’d folded the test results into a Father’s Day card and waited for her boyfriend to come home two days later.

 

When he walked through the door, weary and sweaty, bags under his eyes and the whites of his eyes red (he never slept as well without her anymore), she was sitting on their overstuffed couch in the living room, Father’s Day card propped up on the entryway table where he was sure to see it when he came in. She watched with nails digging into her palms a little as he set his two duffel bags down and cracked his neck. He took off his hat and ruffled his hair, his curls fluffing a little around him (in the way Gwen found adorable two years ago and still does, only now she can run her own fingers through it and tell him how adorable it is as he blushes in the back of his neck the way he does). Eyes seeking her out through the ledge between their entryway and living room, he smiles wide at her, full of dimples, before starting to walk _past the fucking entry table_ and towards her. She must have made a noise because he cocks his head then in question, raising one eyebrow while still staring at her.

 

“ Got you something,” Gwen says softly, fidgeting a little from her spot on the couch. Blake grins then, a slow, flirty thing. He crosses his arms and cocks one hip.

 

“ Yeah?” He drawls. He starts to move towards her again but she interrupts him.

 

“ Look on the entry table,” She says softly again, nudging her head towards it, and he furrows her brow but keeps grinning and takes the card, opening the envelope with long fingers. His furrow deepens as he reads the slogan on the outside about Father’s Day; it’s nowhere near Father’s Day (Apollo Zuma and Kingston would get him a father’s day card in the upcoming one, though, at Zuma’s insistence). She stares, rapt, at him.

 

 “ Gwen, what—-“ He begins, and she interrupts him again.

 

“ Open it,” Gwen says. Blake does and the test results fall out, as does the sonogram picture she had taken of their tiny little spec (she figured Blake would forgive her for getting the first one by herself when he sees it, and as his eyes widen in realization she knows that he will). His mouth falls open and he stares up at her and down at the card in quick succession.

 

“ Oh my god you’re—-“ Blake begins, and he cant go on because he puts a hand over his mouth and Gwen can practically see his eyes fill even though she’s too far away to see them in any great detail. Gwen smiles then from across the room, laughing under her breath.

 

“ Congratulations Daddy,” She murmurs only loud enough for him to hear her. Hear her he does, because he looks up at her again with tear filled eyes and a totally blissed out expression on his face. She can’t help herself then. She hops off the couch and meets him halfway from where he’s practically running to her, throwing her arms around his neck as he picks her up and spins her around. He’s crying and she’s crying and then she’s laughing and he’s laughing. He puts her down and immediately sinks to his knees, lifting up the material of her t-shirt to press kiss after kiss to her bare stomach, burying his face in it for a second and stroking his hand over it. 

 

She lets him worship for a few seconds before she cups his cheeks and raises his head to look at her. There are tear tracks on his face but he’s smiling the widest she’s ever seen, and she strokes her thumbs over his face reverently. He stands then and takes her hands.

 

“ You….” He has to clear his throat because the first word comes out hoarse and half choked. “ You want this, right?” He finishes the question tentatively and then braces for the answer like she might tell him no and demand to go to the doctor immediately. Her brow furrows, and she’s totally puzzled why he would even ask that. 

 

“ Blake, “ She says, and its simultaneously puzzled and a little reproachful and surprised. She cups his cheeks and kisses him, smiling into it, and he gets it. The moment of awkwardness that his question has caused is gone when he hugs her again, picking her up bridal style to put her on the couch, where he lays his head against her stomach again and mutters to it. Gwen giggles, telling him that the baby wouldn’t be able to understand _anything_ yet, and he falls asleep for awhile as she strokes his hair and he nuzzles his nose against her belly.

 

An hour later he’s awake and they have deep, passionate sex until the middle of the night, and she knows she’ll never get tired of his panted breaths in her ear and his artless tongue kisses when he’s nearing the brink and the way he always makes sure she’s taken care of before seeking his own pleasure. They lie awake in the afterglow and he tells her how Miranda had had two abortions when they were married that she’d told him about after she’d had them and how he respected her choice but still felt like he was losing a child both times either way. She holds him against her and he strokes his fingertips over her belly unconsciously.

 

Within a week, he’s proposed to her. He tells her that he’s had the ring since a little before Christmas but was waiting till her birthday to actually do it and she grins and helps him put the ring on her finger and asks how he feels about a small private wedding with less than twenty people in Oklahoma before she starts to show. He kisses each of her fingertips and then her lips, and they lie next to each other in bed that night and talk about plans. 

 

Within a month, they’re married in a ceremony at the back of Blake’s ranch by his private stretch of river. She wears flowers in her hair and a sundress and very little makeup, and they’re barefoot and the ceremony ends when Apollo accidentally pushes Gwen into the deep part of the river and Kingston and Zuma jump in after her, laughing (Blake eventually comes in too after Adam practically forces him to, and the way they’re freezing afterwards with sodden clothing is worth it for the way they all hug like a family before coming to shore). Gwen surprises Blake on their wedding night when she shows him their marriage license and she’s changed her name to Gwen Stefani Shelton, and he gets tears in his eyes that she kisses away as he peels the sodden sundress from her body and makes love to her out by the stars while the boys are with Blake’s parents. 

 

Within six months, Gwen’s back on the Voice and she’s visibly showing and glowing. He pampers her and babies her, bringing her tea in between segments and constantly looking at her to make sure she’s ok. He’s sitting next to her now ( at his pleading, she’d learned and that had driven her a little crazy but she’d dealt with it when she’d found out) and he tucks her hair behind her ear and rubs the small of her back and sometimes reaches out to hold her hand during a particularly poignant song until Gwen finally explodes out of frustration during a commercial break and shouts at him backstage that he doesn’t have to treat her like she’ll break and that she’s a strong independent woman who’s done this before. Gwen tells him he’s driving her crazy and to lay off before she switches seats with Adam. 

 

Both Adam and Pharell have wide eyes as they look at them and Blake is visibly chastened, slinking off back to his seat with his shoulders slumped and hands in his pockets. He’s quieter during the next segment, and he looks anywhere but her. Out of the corner of her eye she sees him sit on his hands at one point when her back twinges as she stands up and she can’t quite disguise her wince. Adam takes her aside later and explains that Blake is _fucking terrified_ that he’ll do something to screw either her or the baby up and that he pampers her because he’s never gotten to do it before. Adam reminds her that though she’s not a first time mother he is a first time father and she sees his implication that she needs to have a little more understanding. 

 

She sees Adam’s point and goes to apologize to her husband, finds him slouched over a little in his chair with his eyes tracking her up until the point she can see him, upon which time he looks to the floor and then pretends like he’s been looking at his phone the whole time. She looks around her and finds people paying attention to other things (finally, their novelty had worn off, and for the most part people left their relationship alone unless they posed for pictures. She can’t remember the last time anyone followed them during an intimate private moment and oh my god it makes her so happy), and she cups his cheeks in her hands. He still is looking anywhere but her and she tells her husband to meet her eyes before she kisses him firmly, hands scratching through his hair and almost unconsciously his own hands come to rub at her sore lower back a little. She says _I'm sorry_ and _I love you,_ and he murmurs the words back before asking shyly if he might be able to bring her more tea. She smiles at him and kisses his forehead the way he loves to hers and says that she’d _probably be okay with that._ During the next segment, when a particularly poignant song is being sung by a contestant that both Blake and Gwen love, Gwen reaches out for his hand between the seats, and he looks surprised as he meets it. She squeezes it and mouths an endearment to him before pressing her button at the same time he does, and they remain holding hands the rest of the song even as the camera lights focus in on them. When he wins the contestant over her he stands up and kisses her hand in consolation and then her cheek and she smiles and blushes and the audience _awws._

 

If anyone told Gwen a year ago that she’d be where she was, pregnant and married and in love, she’d laugh in their faces. If anyone told Gwen that in two years she’d be watching as a little curly haired toddler that was a mini- girl version of Blake ran to him while shouting _Daddy_ with a giggle, she’d smile. If anyone told her that they’d name their little girl Ramona Caroline Shelton, she’d nod and say _of course_ because Ramona was his grandmother’s name and Caroline was her grandmother’s name. If anyone told her that in two years she’d be where she is, watching as a little girl steadily wraps Blake around her finger with each giggle, she’d think _because that’s where i’m meant to be._

**Author's Note:**

> Maybe if we all close our eyes and concentrate hard enough Gwen and Blake will re-appear. Anyone with me? Well, the saving grace of them not being in the press lately is that hopefully their relationship will lose public appeal and they can have some stinking privacy. But, i'm still trash so I still want some news :P.


End file.
